This person reminded me that things are getting a little lax around here. The exact words might have been, “OK, 8-11-11 was the post on your website, get with it!”
Now, before you are tempted to think…”whatever”. Let me ‘splain some things to you, Lucy!
First, my fan/cheerleader/stalker does not look like this...
No Sir E. Bob, not here in Dysfunction land.
My fan sends threatening messages that say, “If I have to come to town and do something stupid so you will post it, I WILL!” And they look something like this…
Meet my friend Norm. He is now like family, but he started out as a “bonus” friend. That’s right, a bonus friend. When I married Rick he came with some pretty good friends as a bonus and this is how I met Norm. Not all the friends are a bonus, some I don’t claim at all—I hear they drive mini vans*shudder*
Anyway, Norm is actually an alias for my bonus friend/fan. And why do we call him Norm? Well, I’m glad you asked! If you’re old enough to remember the TV Series “Cheers” than this should explain it all. (It helps if you imagine Norm back-in-the-day, when he had lots of curly hair)
If you don’t know the show, then please go back to your “Yo Gabba Gabba reruns, because we obviously have nothing in common.
So…sweet, fun loving, everyone’s friend Norm is/was and always will be a little
bit…well…how do I explain?......He’s the one that always has things “go terribly wrong”. He’s the one that wakes up after a party with a baby hitting him in the head with a bottle (not his). He’s the one who chips his front tooth during a bachelor party (don’t ask). The point is, the boy means well but I don’t need him coming up here to “do something stupid”. For the love of cheese!! Who knows what would happen.
So, in the spirit of keeping my favorite fan happy….Normie, this story is for you, and if any of my stories EVER make you laugh so hard that you get that little clicky noise in your throat..please tell me, I miss that sound :)
So, I have recently begun the adventure of homeschooling. There is lots of words I can think to describe the experience...exhasting, exciting, insane, wonderful, fullfilling, challenging, AWESOME !
You get the idea…However, with all the bliss comes a few changes.
10 Things I discovered since Homeschooling
1. $0.99 school supplies ARE exciting
2. There are not enough cabinets in my house for all the “extra” school supplies. There is paper, notepads, folders, and books everywhere. Yet, we still
can’t find a good stinkin’ pencil! Ugh
3.Acccording to my girl, our team name is the Homeschool Homers–cool mascot? Doubt it…and who are we playing against anyway? The Block Bullys?
4. Homework Sucks—Oh wait, that’s ALL our work
5. I need more wall space for timelines, maps, felt clocks. Also a chalkboard and magnet/dry erase would be good too if you have an extra laying around
6. I am not smarter than a 3rd grader, do I really need to explain this one?!
7. Due to the cost of copies, we may have a school fundraiser--$3.00 school supplies anyone?
8. Reward stickers are AWESOME no matter how old you are
9. Apparently I’m scarier than Dad. The kids asked if I would be principal instead. Great self-esteem builder for me…
10. A little education goes a long way…we did life size body outline, taped them to the wall and cut out each internal organ while learning about it. So now every time the boy goes to the bathroom, he announces, “I’M GOING TO USE MY
Love ya Norm